I think I really did loose my sanity there.

I will start by telling you that adopting a rescue is no picnic. I have been on an emotional roller coaster. First let me state that I am not a control freak, but like control of my life. For many years my life has been out of control and now that things are totally normal I decide to whip my existence into a frenzy. I must say also that sleep deprivation causes insanity and depression, I should know. Yesterday was so bad I almost fell asleep at the wheel.
The transition with the dog has not been the easiest. OK its been hell, for me anyway. I think she has adjusted better than I have. I realize now that when she has an accident in the house it is my failure. I have never punished her for this, I'm using the school of thought that you don't punish an animal for accidents or they will hide them from you, but it doesn't make it any easier to accept. For most of her training, again I go to Cesar Millan. I read Ceasar's Way in about a week and it really has helped with so many of her issues. Bubbles is an absolute joy to walk, I could spend hours with her on leash. She is a model of submission when on leash. With Ceasar's help from his book, she is almost over her fear of cars, although a semi set her back.
She is truly a wonderful dog, it's me that seems to be having issues. Everything that I deem as failure has me so depressed. In so many ways there is too much pressure on me for success. My daughter is totally attached to her, in fact when I mentioned to her that this may not work, she had a dream that Bubbles got cancer. My husband isn't fond of dogs to begin with and so I need to succeed so we can live in peace, and I can sleep in our bed again (I am sleeping on the couch attached to Bubbles by leash so that when she wakes up to go potty, she wakes me up. I tried crating her and that went very badly). I am so stubborn that I can't fail or I will fail myself. I realize that giving her up isn't an option, she is too attached to the family and I can't give her to someone else and hope she isn't abused again. She is so easily frightened, and men can terrify her. All it takes is a look from my husband and she pees from submission. Most people would be angry at her, I tell my husband he must clear his mind before approaching her if he is angry. We had two weeks of none of this behavior and then she upset my husband and off we went again. It is more like training of the humans, than of the dog. Cesar is too right. Hopefully I am not rambling to much, I will try to blog when I am not so tired. Goodnight :)