A dream I once had

Ever question what a dream means when you have one. I never bought a dream dictionary or anything but I do have some of the strangest dreams. The one that haunts me to this day is the dream I had that my husband, my two children and I were living at my mother's house. It was a dark and horrible morning, more like 5:00 a.m. My husband is downstairs getting an egg ready and I look out the front window and a giant squid is attacking my parent's neighbor's house. And just like in every horror movie it is absolute mayhem outside, people, screaming cars exploding, rain and thunder. I yell to my husband, who is a taekwondo master and can obviously defend us from this monster. I scream "Hurry and put on your superman suit, the giant squid is coming!" My husband looks at me and says very calmly "I must finish my egg first." What!!!! His egg is more important than getting on his superman suit and saving the world. What does this mean? His breakfast comes first? The squid is so slow that he can cook an egg, get dressed and still save the world? Why do I dream these strange dreams? What does it say about my psyche that I want to see my husband in a superman suit?
Sometimes I am a wonder even to myself.

Discoveries made while lying in bed

Last night I was in bed trying to keep my husband awake (so he could rub our itchy child) and I put my fingertips on his back and they started vibrating. Humming actually. It was the weirdest sensation. I thought "Wow, that is an electrical current! But coming out of my husband's shoulder?" So I told him about the strange humming emitting from his shoulder blade. He couldn't feel anything, and just thought it was the massive glass of wine I had drunk. I kept playing with the current, using the space on the top of my hand (the unnamed space between your first knuckle and second). Then I had a brilliant idea to convince him that there really was an electric current coming from his back. I thought if he had one, I must too. So I had him check my back. Lo-and-behold, I was humming too. I also could not feel this strange vibration. We checked our children and they were not humming with electricity. We started to think about the possiblity that we were picking up these vibrations from our Sunbeam electric blanket, maybe it was putting out EMF's, so we switched it off and the vibrations went away. So today I google "are electric blankets safe" and this pops up.

"ELECTRIC BLANKET EMF’S (60 Hz Electromagnetic Frequency Waves)

In the late 1980’s and early 1990’s, some scientists and others began to be concerned over the safety of electromagnetic fields (EMF’s). Various studies in that timeframe had raised concerns over the possibility that the EMF’s generated by power companies’ overhead transmission lines and some appliances could cause cancer especially in children. The United States government became involved and studied over 500 peer reviewed papers written on this potential problem. The National Research Council spent around 65 million dollars and finally stated that there was no conclusive evidence that residential EMF’s play any role in the development of cancer, in reproductive issues or in learning/behavioral issues. Nevertheless Sunbeam, which was then the only major United States manufacturer of electric blankets, altered the design of its products to reduce EMF’s. Redesigned blankets produced after 1992 had much weaker electrical fields than their predecessors. The argument over EMF’s has never gone away completely although very few scientists and medical experts continue to believe that they can cause problems."

http://www.electricblanketinstitute.com/Safety.html

If your back is humming because of EMF's I have to wonder, can that be good? Sunbeam needs to look at their design again because I don't think being able to run electric current through your body is a really good thing. Maybe I can use the blanket as a back up generator.

I know how I'm going to die Do you?

I have confronted hunters with loaded guns! I have walked on super thin ice! Was I shot? NO! Did I fall in the 28 ft deep pond? NO! Why did I do these things? Am I an imbecile? NO! I know that nothing but stairs can kill me. How do I know this? It has been foretold by my 8 year old son. I will die a horrible death by falling down the stairs. So if I avoid stairs I will live forever. I am thinking about skydiving. Parachute or no parachute?

The slogan of an unsuccessful company.

Yesterday I went to whole foods (or whole paycheck depending on who you're talking to) and bought three things for around $11.00. I bought organic chocolate chips, organic coconut, and organic marshmallows (organic marshmallows is like trade in diamonds). Did you see what I paid around $11.00! I hope whole foods sees this, because I might shop there now. Although your lentils are pricey, $1.99 a pound. My friend told me not to buy those (she wanted 5 pounds). Imagine if you lowered your price on those you could have made another $5.00 at least.
So absolutely shocked at the prices I found I had to call my friend about 5 times to make sure I was still on the planet.(By the sixth time, I think I had really annoyed her,which is my goal in life), (Sparkles in case you ever read this) but the last time was a must phone call. I look over at the passenger seat of my car, that's where the most important bags go and I read on the bag "Everything you expect from a store and less" Is this good advertising I ask myself? I had to read it three times, then make that important call. I needed to check that I read it right. Everything I want from a store and less, what are they trying to say? Not everything I want for less. Whole foods is less than a store. Are they missing a wall? Or the beverage section. I mean, how would the average consumer see this? A store that is less. I thought about calling the store and asking what they mean by this demeaning statement (or taking the online survey if they have one). But then I thought if it is keeping the prices lower because people won't go, (I mean come on, it is less than a store), than that is divine providence, and I can't mess with that. Praise God!

I am speechless

I know I titled this I am speechless but I have something to say. Emily Bear. Ok, enough said. Oh a little more, she composed this song.

news for dummies

This has been a harsh week. Starting on Sunday our power went out due to a wind storm. 60 mph winds will do that. Not just us but 240,000 others, so I was trying to cope and know others were having just as much of a hard time. But then I read this article in the Free Press or Detroit News (the same anyway) (Ha! I just let people know I live in Michigan) about this woman that had her power out for like 5 hours. She was talking about how horrible it was for her children and her that they had to lay under blankets and it just kept getting colder. We were out for 4 days! I wasn't interviewed! My interview may have gone something like this. "yeah, it was cold in the morning, but this woman that had her power out for 5 hours, she really understood the awfulness of it all. Instead of going to the library where they had power, or the mall, man, she just like rode it out. What a trooper."
Does the newspaper look for the stupidest people in the area and post only their interview? I think they do, because then they can have an article that they write themselves that states how to survive a power outage in the winter. Like going to the store all day, maybe renting a hotel room. Because we are obviously too stupid to come up with these ideas on our own. Then the newspaper can feel like someone's hero. So here is my winter survival tip if you ever run out of power in the winter "FOR ALL YOU STUPID PEOPLE stay the heck away from your house until power is restored." Print that newsman!

Queen for a day....?

Last night at around 7:00 p.m. I officially became "QUEEN FOR THE DAY" (all Caps because it is so important). Have you ever threatened your husband with beheading, which is legal when you are a queen? I got to (jealous?). So how did I earn such a prestigious title (I know you want to). I found something that was lost. It was that simple. I was considering murder when my daughter lost her Carpatina doll French princess outfit. But instead I offered to my "very good children who would never take advantage of an offer of royalty" that if one of them found it they could be royalty for the day.
I FOUND IT!!! That earns me the title of "QUEEN FOR THE DAY" I haven't quite figured out how I am going to live it up yet as I have to clean the house, cook for a Christmas party, do laundry, and pay the bills. Oh I was just informed that I have to help shovel the snow from our latest snowstorm off of the driveway. But my moment is coming. QUEEN FOR THE DAY RULES!!!